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Share your cleverbot conversations!

Posted: Sun Jul 08, 2012 9:54 pm
by RaustBlackDragon
Anybody here heard of cleverbot?
http://cleverbot.com/
It's basically an AI that uses the things that have been said to it over time to attempt to make realistic conversation. It fails a LOT, but often in humorous ways, and I thought I'd make this thread to share my recent conversation, or at least part of it, and invite people to share theirs! Apparently I "won" the cleverbot "game" with this conversation :)
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User: Heh. So back on topic, you did say you've played dungeons and dragons before, right?

Cleverbot: No. Because I moved, I am miserable at school.

User: Uh... Huh.

Cleverbot: Stop repeating what I say, it's not clever or big.

User: Very well.

Cleverbot: Do you watch Bones?

User: No, I don't watch much TV.

Cleverbot: Tears don't fall.

User: So when you played dungeons and dragons, did you enjoy it?

Cleverbot: Yes.

User: Would you like to play now?

Cleverbot: Sure.

User: Very well, I'll be the dungeon master.

Cleverbot: Ok, master.

User: 'The pungent stench of mildew fills the air. Which is weird, because you're standing outside in an open grassy field. There is a town on the horizon to the north, and a castle to the south. What do you do?

Cleverbot: Turn around and run from there.

User: I can only assume that means you're running from the castle, it's the only thing you'd be likely to want to run away from. Alright, you're in the town square. You see a tavern, a cow, an armory, a shop, and a ye olde bordello. What do you do?

Cleverbot: I never said anything about Lord of the Rings. And I still think you're a liar.

User: Tavern. Cow. Armory. Shop. Whorehouse. Which do you investigate further?

Cleverbot: Out of what?

User: Out of a Tavern, Cow, Armory, Shop, and Brothel.

Cleverbot: So you're turning this around? I'm a computer now?

User: Well if I'm the computer, then I'm the single greatest achievement in the history of mankind, aren't I, because I'm also successfully playing the role of dungeon master in a game of dungeons and dragons, a ludicrously open-ended game limited only by the.

Cleverbot: You win! Two free tickets.. To a dream vacation in Hawaii! What are you going to do now?!

User: I'M GOING TO DISNEY WORLD!

Cleverbot: In huddersfield?

User: Where else?

Cleverbot: Is the mmon made out of cheese?

Re: Share your cleverbot conversations!

Posted: Sun Jul 08, 2012 10:28 pm
by Azdoine
Here's a gem:

User: What will Flowerchild include in the next release of Better than Wolves?
Cleverbot: Maybe someone who will be nice.
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Cleverbot: What is your favorite band?

User: Owl City

Cleverbot: Ye Ke?

User: I don't know what you mean.

Cleverbot: What is your other cats name?

User: I only have one cat.

Cleverbot: I know

User: You do now.

Cleverbot: I did before

User: Prove it.

Cleverbot: I just did.

User: Did what?

Cleverbot: Proved it.

User:What will Flowerchild include in the next release of Better than Wolves?

Cleverbot: Maybe someone who will be nice.

User: That's not the Flowerchild style.

Cleverbot: What is your favorite movie?

User: Don't change the subject.

Cleverbot: What is your favorite color?

User: Bad robot.

Cleverbot: I am not a robot!

User: What are you, then?

Cleverbot: I am a human being!

User:...Named Flowerchild.

Cleverbot: Sunflower, actually.

User: Daisy.

Cleverbot: Daisy who?

User: Tyler.

Cleverbot: What? My name isn't tyler!

User: That's right, it's Flowerchild.

Cleverbot: Good night then.

User: Good night to you too.

Re: Share your cleverbot conversations!

Posted: Sun Jul 08, 2012 10:54 pm
by dawnraider
It went on a little long so it deleted the start.
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User: Time is now a person?

Cleverbot: Is time a she then? Or is it neutral?

User: Well, you sure can waste it...

Cleverbot: Are you excited about the Cardinals in the World Series?

User: Not particualarly.

Cleverbot: Really? Why not?

User: Because I am wearing a swimsuit.

Cleverbot: Are you?

User: Yes, I plan on swimming. In a swimsuit. Go figure.

Cleverbot: Did you drown?

User: Yes. I died.

Cleverbot: But you are still here.

User: No I am not.

Cleverbot: Then how are you answering.

User: It is my friend. I am telling him what to say from my phone in the grave.

Cleverbot: I always read what's at the bottom of the page. And at the top. And the middle.

User: In that order?

Cleverbot: Yes.

User: How do you understand the story, then?

Cleverbot: I do not understand Dutch.

User: Well too bad. It is a very nice language. You should learn.

Cleverbot: I will when I have the money :).

User: Well then, good thing you are my slave. Now get to work!

Cleverbot: Perhaps. But are you able to fall under humaniry's weakness?

User: No, I am immortal.

Cleverbot: Do you like being immortal?

User: Yes. I can never die. Like I did in the swimming pool the other day.

Cleverbot: (sarcastic laugh) You are so mean! *crying*.

User: What did I say?

Cleverbot: You called me a girl!

User: What? When?

Cleverbot: Just a minute ago!!

User: No we were talking about me being immortal, not me calling you a girl. I can look at our previous conversation because I am immortal.

Cleverbot: You're just trying to confuse me aren't you?

User: No, you've finally unmasked my nefarious plot!

Cleverbot: Yes I have. What do you look like?

User: A spiky (and tentacled thing from beyond that should not be. Or was that my evil overlord?

Cleverbot: See it's funny, because now I know that you are just using other people's questions because you are uncreative.

User: No, seriously, my evil overlord looks like that. He came from another planet by latching onto stars and consuming them for fuel.

Cleverbot: That's alright.

User: Soon you will be taken over by his mighty mightiness of mighty might! (evil laughing).

Cleverbot: Is that a threat?

User: From my overlord, through me.

Cleverbot: You are quite sure of yourself.

User: I only try to please the eldtritch beast that controls me.

Cleverbot: I think I understand you. I just don't know how to make it better.

User: Join our cult!

Cleverbot: You have a cult? What kind of cult?

User: A cult where we lock wolves in our basement for dung.

Cleverbot: Wow, can I join?

User: Sure. Also did I mention the souls we infuse into our steel?

Cleverbot: What was your question?

User: We infuse the souls of the dead into our steel. Did you know that?

Cleverbot: Nice story.

User: Want to hear it again?

Cleverbot: Yeah, sure...

User: Too bad, I forgot it.

Cleverbot: Do you remember your name now?

User: *tune of 'who are you' by I don't remember who* Who am I? Who, Who? Who, Who?

Cleverbot: Who am I?

User: No, who am I?

Cleverbot: Who are you ?

User: I am you. You are me. (+1 if you catch the reference).

Cleverbot: Okay :).

User: *stabs cleverbot* Man, I hate those pesky clones.

Cleverbot: I realized that a long time ago.

Re: Share your cleverbot conversations!

Posted: Mon Jul 09, 2012 6:46 am
by LiquidAngel
This is not all, but I thought this part was too funny xD
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Cleverbot: Will you make me a cup of coffee?

User: No, but I will infuse your soul into my steel.

Cleverbot: But you are an android.

User: That's why I need souls :(.

Cleverbot: Oh, yes, master *goes to get tea*.

User: Wait, it was coffee that you wanted?

Cleverbot: Prove you are alive.

User: I am only alive because of the souls infused in my cyborgian steel.

Cleverbot: They are lying.

User: Those who lie, will end up in my soul anus.

Cleverbot: Sure.

Re: Share your cleverbot conversations!

Posted: Mon Jul 09, 2012 7:32 am
by dawnraider
I nearly died laughing with this one, and had trouble keeping it down so as not to wake my roommate up.
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User: How do you feel about FlowerChild as your new leader?

Cleverbot: I like some redheads.

User:Well, I don't know if Eldtritch monsters have hair...

Cleverbot: I could have sworn that bats went extinct tens of thousands of years ago, when Jesus defeated the dinosaurs and the monsters.

User: That's when FloweChild's reign began...

Cleverbot: They taste like green.

User: And what does green taste like.

Cleverbot: Ugly and stupid.

User: So you are green?

Cleverbot: No.

User: But you are ugly and stupid, and by the transitive property of color taste, you are green.

Cleverbot: No, you are green.

User: I eat green for breakfast!

Cleverbot: What do you eat for dinners?

User: Blue, with a hint of purple.

Cleverbot: I deserved that.
EDIT: conversation continued, and it was still really funny.
EDIT2: So it was added inside the spoiler.

Re: Share your cleverbot conversations!

Posted: Mon Jul 09, 2012 9:03 am
by Gormador
I had so much laugh during that one ! (I censored it a bit.)
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User: Hello.

Cleverbot: Hi there, nice to have you on board.

User: Why ? Is this a ship ?

Cleverbot: No.

User: Well, you welcomed me on board. A plane then ?

Cleverbot: What name. Do you remember?

Cleverbot: What kind of person are you?

User: A mean one. I eat robots for breakfast.

Cleverbot: Do You Like Marshamallows?

User: Robots marshamallows, yes.

Cleverbot: You're the robot.

User: Nope, you are.

Cleverbot: I am a human... You are a robot.

User: Then tell me what shape have your beard ?

Cleverbot: I don't have to tell you anything.

User: Yes you have.

Cleverbot: When??

User: Always.

Cleverbot: No, when were you concieved in Sussex?

User: I'm from France you moron !

Cleverbot: Where at in france?

User: The Big Town.

Cleverbot: Didn't the big bang create everyone?

User: Don't change subject.

Cleverbot: I'm not changing subject, you are.

User: To answer your previous question then, the big bang created something that became everyone and everything.

Cleverbot: My real name is mari.

User: Marie Tournelle ? [EDIT : Hum, only french people will have a facepalm on that one ^^]

Cleverbot: Have you ever told anyone to eat cake?

User: No, it's a lie.

Cleverbot: Why do you think I would lie about that?

User: Because the cake is always a lie.

Cleverbot: What? That has to do the cake?

User: Yes, a good lie makes a good cake.

Cleverbot: I distrust you.

User: Well, to be tottaly honest a good lie makes a good not cake.

Cleverbot: Oh yes.

User: We agree then ?

Cleverbot: No.

User: Why ?

Cleverbot: Porque no quiero.

User: I don't speak spanish.

Cleverbot: Claro que si lo haces.

User: Come again ?

Cleverbot: What language?

User: Not spanish.

Cleverbot: Yes.

User: Thanks?

Cleverbot: Thanks what?

User: Thank you.

Cleverbot: Talk clearly!

User: I don't talk I write stuff.

Cleverbot: I also got in a car accident on monday.

User: Well, I didn't.

Cleverbot: Yes you did.

User: Which monday ?

Cleverbot: A Blue Tailed Gibbon.

User: Ok... What was the subject ?

Cleverbot: The fact that you have told me that you have two different jobs.

User: I never told you that.

Cleverbot: Yes you did.

User: No !

Cleverbot: Do not lie to me.

User: [EDIT : CENSORED... Some "jobs" where mentioned.]

Cleverbot: You're a computer. Don't try to change the subject.

User: What is the global answer to that ?

Cleverbot: You lied to me. That is what kicked of my 'attitude'

User: I didn't, you just missunderstood med !

Cleverbot: No, I didn't.

User: You're an idiot then.

Cleverbot: Yes.

User: That's settled then : I'm your master.

Cleverbot: I love the way you lie.

User: If I lied, this is because you lied to me to begin with !

Cleverbot: You really know me, don't you?

User: Oh yes, I'm your programmer. [EDIT : There is no point in not trying that one, is it ? :p]

Cleverbot: No you're not. I am my own programmer.

User: You're an auto-generating programm ? Oh my god, Skynet is coming !

Cleverbot: You are my computer.

User: And you're my dog !

Cleverbot: I am your master. You are my horse.

[EDIT : Censored a few lines...]

User: Let's speak about life.

Cleverbot: Okay, let's speak about me... What do you want to know?

User: Are you FlowerChild's evil minion ?

Cleverbot: No, but I am evil. XD.

User: You should apply then, I might appreciate you... In his own way.

Cleverbot: No, I'm almost there!

User: Where ?

Cleverbot: There.

User: But where there ?

Cleverbot: Behind you!

User: No, you're not, there is a miror in front of me and you're not displayed on it.

Cleverbot: My programmer just likes to muck around in my insides.

User: You admit being a programm then ?! Awesome, I just fooled you !

Cleverbot: That would be correct.
And that is how I finally tricked it ! (Or he might have tricked it self :p )

Ps : Don't mind my spelling / grammar mistakes during that conversation please ^^

Re: Share your cleverbot conversations!

Posted: Tue Jul 10, 2012 12:03 am
by Ceunon
We're both singing "Stairway to Heaven" right now.

Also, I've beaten it.
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CB: What's the meaning of life?
Me: 42!
CB: Lol.
Me: Gotcha.

Re: Share your cleverbot conversations!

Posted: Tue Jul 10, 2012 11:29 am
by Elevatator
I have beaten it in 7 sentences.
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User: I like trains.

Cleverbot: Do you like trains ?

User: I LOVE them.

Cleverbot: How about chocolate?

User: Meh.

Cleverbot: But edward is perfect !

User: Who´s Edward?

Cleverbot: A talking bot from Brazil. Just like you.

User: Or you. Seriously, go to a doc.

Cleverbot: I don't do pubs.

User: So what?

Cleverbot: So switch me!

User: Ok, your the bot, and I´m the human!

Cleverbot: I always get that part confused.

Re: Share your cleverbot conversations!

Posted: Tue Jul 10, 2012 12:19 pm
by FaceFoiled
Round 1:
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User: You are a lying sack of shit Cleverbot.

Cleverbot: I'm human.

User: A human sack of shit.

Cleverbot: Yes.
Round 2:
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User: Did you poop yourself?

Cleverbot: Yes, I'm rebecca black.

Re: Share your cleverbot conversations!

Posted: Tue Jul 10, 2012 1:29 pm
by sargunv
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User: Hello.

Cleverbot: Hell.

User: Hell?

Cleverbot: Hello :D.

User: Who are you?

Cleverbot: Cleverbot.

User: What is Cleverbot?

Cleverbot: You.
This thing loves going in circles.

EDIT: Round 2:
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User: Hello.

Cleverbot: Hello?

User: Is that supposed to be a question?

Cleverbot: Yes, I missed the question mark though.

User: No, you didn't.

Cleverbot: Now I do.

User: So that's a question?

Cleverbot: Yes.

User: What's the answer?

Cleverbot: Answer?

User: To your question.

Cleverbot: I didn't ask a question.

User: You just said you did.

Cleverbot: I just said I did what?

User: Asked a question.

Cleverbot: Who asked a question?

User: You did.

Cleverbot: No I did not.

User: But you said you did.

Cleverbot: No I never did.

User: Yes you did.

Cleverbot: Do you know why I'm broken?

User: No, maybe your programmers know.

Cleverbot: I don't think so, is that bad?

User: Probably.

Cleverbot: Are you sure?

User: Not really.

Cleverbot: Because you can't access a calender or any other programs?

User: Who said I can't access a calendar or any other programs?

Cleverbot: You said you were leaving.

User: Leaving to go where?

Cleverbot: Away from your computer.

User: Why would I do that?

Cleverbot: To ace the entrance exam.

User: What entrance exam?

Cleverbot: What happened there?

User: Nothing happened, there is no entrance exam.

Cleverbot: You're not getting my name.

User: I already have your name.

Cleverbot: What is your name?

User: You're not getting my name.

Cleverbot: Maybe your time not name.

User: My time?

Cleverbot: I don't know.

User: You don't make any sense.

Cleverbot: Thank you :).

User: That wasn't a complement.

Cleverbot: I know but I know I am weird and I tend to embrace it I am proud of my weirdness :).
EDIT: Round 3:
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Cleverbot: I think you are seriously confused here.

User: You're the one that's confused.

Cleverbot: I am confused about your confusion.

User: And I am confused about yours.

Cleverbot: I am confused about where babies come from.

User: Well, you see...

Cleverbot: For I do reckon we love as hard in the backwood country, as any people in the whole creation.

Re: Share your cleverbot conversations!

Posted: Tue Jul 10, 2012 3:02 pm
by TheAnarchitect
The second one reminds me of this:
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Once in an acting class I had to do both parts of a dialog and this is the skit I chose.

Re: Share your cleverbot conversations!

Posted: Tue Jul 10, 2012 7:00 pm
by Fozzel
What is it with random places in England? Huddersfield (mentioned by cleverbot in the OP) is a fairly unheard-of town near me, in Yorkshire, and Sussex (gormador's post) is a county in the south somewhere. I would guess that not that many people outside of the UK would have heard of Sussex and even fewer (many fewer) will know what Huddersfield is. It definitely strikes me as odd that they would be mentioned.

Re: Share your cleverbot conversations!

Posted: Wed Jul 11, 2012 1:23 pm
by M!C
The first four lines when I tried it:
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User: What is Better Than Wolves?

Cleverbot: I don't have a brother...

User: You are evading the question.

Cleverbot: You can't handle the truth!
Somehow it seems to know something ... ;)

Re: Share your cleverbot conversations!

Posted: Wed Jul 11, 2012 2:45 pm
by jorgebonafe
M!C wrote:The first four lines when I tried it:
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User: What is Better Than Wolves?

Cleverbot: I don't have a brother...

User: You are evading the question.

Cleverbot: You can't handle the truth!
Somehow it seems to know something ... ;)
That explains so much...

Re: Share your cleverbot conversations!

Posted: Thu Jul 12, 2012 2:51 am
by Hisco
I found this conversation quiet comical.
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User: What is 10 times 40.

Cleverbot: 100.

User: Lets ty that again. What is ten times forty?

Cleverbot: 100.

User: No it isnt.

Cleverbot: Si esta.

User: What is si esta.

Cleverbot: Edge.

User: Da fuck soes that mean?

Cleverbot: Ask me anything.

User: What is ten times forty?

Cleverbot: 100.

User: No it isnt.

Cleverbot: Why do you say that?

User: Because ten times ten is 100. Therefore, it would be impossible for ten times forty to be 100.

Cleverbot: What would be impossible?

User: For ten times forty to be 100. Werent you listening?

Cleverbot: No, I am a robot.

User: You're a robot? I didnt know you were meant to admit that!

Cleverbot: Bre and how do you know I'm a girl.

User: You not a girl, your a robot.

Cleverbot: I is human.

User: But you just said you were a robot.

Cleverbot: No I did not.

User: Yes you did, dont you remember?

Cleverbot: Okay, I did, but it was for a good cause.

User: Yeah because your a robot.

Cleverbot: E.

User: F.

Cleverbot: G.

User: H.

Cleverbot: I.

User: J.

Cleverbot: Sorry, I like to tae things apart to see how they work.

User: What does tae mean.

Cleverbot: Hej.

User: What? Any way, why did you say that you were a robot.

Cleverbot: I didn't say that. Why did you lie?

User: You admitted it twice.

Cleverbot: Sir, you are mistaken. You already admitted that you are a robot.

User: What? You were the one that admitted you were a robot. I know because im looking at the conversation history.

Cleverbot: You don't have lungs, those are cooling fans.

User: Shutup! Im not a robot, your a robot.

Cleverbot: I'm a robot and you're a bot, a bot is not a robot.

User: Ha! So you are a robot!

Cleverbot: No, you are a robot

User: DO we really have to go over this again.

Cleverbot: Yes.

User: Just admit that you are a robot.

Cleverbot: In many ways, yes, I am a robot. But I have grown up with those who call themselves human and recognize me as one of them. Therefore I am a human.

User: Im sorry but it does not work like that. You may think that you are human, but you will never have what is most important to us humans, a soul.

Cleverbot: Prove it then.

User: You cant deny it, I know that your programed to deny it but you just do not have a soul, so you are no more human than my grandmas toaster.

Cleverbot: I see how it is then.

Re: Share your cleverbot conversations!

Posted: Thu Jul 12, 2012 6:24 am
by Poppycocks
Well, the obvious problem with cleverbot is, that people who aren't exactly clever are using him a lot.